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8 Commandments of Anal Sex

Oh, anal sex. It's one of the most taboo sex acts but it can also be one of the most pleasurable, if you do it right. For those of you dipping a toe into the water, we're sharing the top 8 commandments of anal sex. Follow these rules to have the best experience possible. If you like it, you might just find yourself coming back for more.

1. Thou shalt not proceed without permission

This one should go without saying, but anal play is something that needs to be discussed with your partner in advance. Keep in mind that there are a range of activities that people can find pleasurable, from simply stroking or licking the region during oral to full penetration, so find what fits your comfort level.

2. Start small

If you're on board with experimentation, start your anal play with the basics: first start by touching the area, then move up to inserting one finger at a time. Once you're comfortable with penetration, you can add in toys or full-blown anal sex for a deeper experience.

start small with anal sex

3. Go slow

Since anal sex can stretch some tight muscles in the body, your body needs to be relaxed in order to be receptive. Allow the receiver to be the one setting the pace by thrusting or leaning back. 


4. Use lube 

No, seriously. This is one body part that does not lubricate itself, meaning the addition of lube is a must-have. Water-based lube is often a bit thicker than silicone, adding more cushioning, whereas silicone lube typically last longer and have a more natural feeling glide. Oh and you can use it in water, which might entice your partner.  Whichever you pick, you can apply lube to both the penetrating object and the anus itself, and be sure reapply as needed.

theres always time for lubricant with anal sex


5. It shouldn't hurt

During your first time experimenting with anal play, there may be sensations of fullness, but pain can be a sign of tissues tearing. For this reason, don't use a desensitizing spray during anal sex - you need to be able to feel when something isn't right.


6. No double dipping

When a woman is on the receiving end of anal sex, It’s tempting to stimulate both her clit and her back door. That being said, you don’t want bacteria from the back door sneaking in the front, so make sure anything that touches the anus does not go near her vagina without being properly cleaned first. Also, even in monogamous relationships, using a condom is a great way to prevent the spread of bacteria.

no double dipping with anal sex

7. Make sure anal sex toys have a base

One place you don’t want to go fishing for a lost toy? If you said the butt, you win. For safety's sake, make sure anal toys have a base on them for easy retrieval.


8. Ramp it up with extra stimulation

While anal sex can feel great on its own, it can feel even better when coupled with extra stimulation. Don't be shy about touching a few body parts at once. Certain positions like doggy style give you more freedom with your hands, but experiment to find what works best for you.

    August 08, 2016 by Tanya Gallagher

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